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What if I’m not
What if I’m wrong
To give love another chance
And set down my reasons?
What if I’m right
To deny these feelings
And embrace the cold?
What if I’m wrong
To step closer and tell you?
What if I’m right
That you could walk away
And you’ve got good reason?
What if
I’m not sure anymore?
What if
I’m supposed to be yours?
But what if I’m not?
E1001-2011
Long about you
I long for the day
When your presence
Doesn’t matter
But for now
Your presence
Is all that matters
E1002-2011
Through pretty words
Can’t repair scars
Cuts heal
Memory retains
Perfect flesh marred
Forever changed
Life continues
Can’t dwell in scars
Must leave this dwelling
I’d rather stroll
Through pretty words
E1003-2012
Failure
Nobody
Who’s never tried
Has ever failed
And nobody
Who’s never chanced
Has ever succeeded
You can’t win
If you don’t play
If you only attempt
What you can achieve
You limit yourself
Is a limited life
All you want?
E1004-2012
Don’t do it
Broken plastic fender
Patched with duct tape
Constant reminder
Of that stupid drink
The blood represents
The life I lost
And a life I wasted
E1005-2012
Story problem
A story problem
Is the excuse you give
To your math teacher
When your homework
Isn’t finished
E1006-2012
In anticipation
Every emotion
Gathered together
To say your name
They’ve attended before
But one at a time
Until you
Now they wait
There’s no secure exit
No safe hold
To slow my fall
Every sense is alive
In anticipation
Hi
E1007-2012
Body doesn’t lie
You say we’re a secret
Your family won’t like
You’ll have to defend
So I’m just someone you know
It’ll be so for a long time
You say you can’t text
It wasn’t part of the plan
You can’t afford it
You text
When we’re together
Your eyes see a lot
But they don’t look at me
You reluctantly take help
But can’t wait to get away
I reach toward
Your hand pulls back
As does your glance
Your hug’s a shoulder lean
You have time to talk
When you want to
You’ve time
For anything you want
Just not for me
After the silence
Things will be better
Your thoughts clearer
During the silence
These are my thoughts
Would you believe?
E1008-2013
The sound of your lies
Your lies seem like
Silent echoes
I deleted you
All letters pictures
And moments shared
There weren’t very many
They were mostly mine
They were mostly lies
Erased from my phone
Texts and pictures
Silly cartoons
But I can’t erase you
You’re a hole in my heart
You hurt me
So that’s it then
I love you
And goodbye
E1009-2013
Trauma
You don’t deserve
The pain I feel
Or tears I cry
When I see
A working girl
Or casino lights
Memories haunt me
Desperate lost wishes
That don’t want to be made
Desperate lost life
Doesn’t want to be saved
What did I do?
E1010-2013
Life of a thoroughbred
I wouldn’t pretend
To define you
Instead I’ll share
Some truth about me
As if observing you
You decide
You won’t do anything
You don’t want to do
You try things you want
And sometimes fail
You discard failure
But things you keep
You do really well
And your own way
You’ll accept help
Only if you need to
Also in your own way
You take modest comfort
In all that you do
And who that makes you
You willingly sacrifice
To preserve who you are
At times it’s difficult
But it’s what makes you
You
E1011-2013
Behind each tear
There’s a scream
No one will hear
Perhaps someone
Someday
You say
I have a passion
For music
I’ve a passion for life
Music’s a channel
I’d say
My greatest passion
Is for words
My mouth stumbles
So I write
Sometimes sing
I’ve a passion for love
My heart stumbles
So I cry
And behind each tear
There’s a scream
E1012-2013
You
You drag me
Kicking and screaming
To a better place
Push me past my limits
I no longer see limits
I look through you
To see anything
You cause me to consider you
In all thoughts
You nourish my growth
And lift my sight
You complete me
And make me content
You quiet my fear
That’s what you mean to me
E1013-2013
Perfect ending
The value of gold
Is measured in quality
Not quantity
The stage we shared
For a brief moment
Was better than love
Where you found me
Was a lifetime away
From where you left me
Who could know our time
May well turn out to be
My happiest
I spoke of ‘extraordinaries’
You only get to meet a few
You’re definitely extraordinary
We may not meet again
Never talk or share
But what you’ve given
Has no price
Your life will be full
Hectic and content
Please keep what I’ve given
Don’t question it
Promise time to your heart
To your music and joy
Remember me kindly
As you play
Just as I
Will never forget you
Lauren S
E1014-2013
The God’s honest truth
Is that I love you
For who you are
What you’ve meant to me
And for the rest of my life
How you changed me
So I’m keeping your pick
As a piece of time
You and your guitar
It will stay with me
You’ll be there too
And I’ll miss you
And love you
My friend
And forever smile
E1015-2013
With you
You’re in my every day
Whether you’re there or not
You’re in everything I do
There’s something
That I don’t talk about
And you won’t
What we share
Is bigger than either of us
I don’t want you out
And I don’t want out
In every attribute
Your strength and courage
Intelligence and talent
Anxiety and frustration
Oh and lest I forget
You’re beautiful
In everything you are
And everything you do
You are my ‘ten’
You make me laugh
You make me sigh
You make me crazy
You make me cry
If I could script my life
Whether good or bad
Happy or sad
Through calm and calamity
Or complete insanity
Whatever comes to be
And understanding
It would be bunny free
Without a second’s thought
Every moment
I would script with you
E1016-2013
Where is everybody?
Is a question with a very long
And improbable answer
Because by the time
The answer is completed
Nearly everyone has moved
E1017-2013
Lauren S
Hey Lauren
How are you?
It’s been awhile
I hope this finds you well
We go through life
Doing and being
And seeing for a time
Until we get to a point
It seems we’ve seen and been
And gone and done
Everything’s still moving
But it slowed down
When we weren’t looking
We don’t know why
And we didn’t ask
It repeats
Every fourteen years or so
Happened to me
Then a spark came along
And ignited my life
Interfered with my writing
Awakened my dream
That spark was you
I’ll never forgive you
If my plans hold true
I may have four
Cycles left
It’s odd to think about
Because of you
Each one will be better
And next time I hope
I’ll see the spark coming
And be eager to learn
You weren’t perfect
You really weren’t
And yet you really were
So my prayer in return
Is that as you go and do
And be and see
And if it all slows down
I hope you find your spark
E1018-2014
Child sees a child
Laughing and playing
And screaming for love
Crying and ranting
And pleading above
Waiting and wanting
But wait
Time is a crime
It can’t be seen
It wraps us
Chokes us
Invisible to hope
It steals us alone
Which finds us
Frantically digging
Broken nails
Bloody fingers
Silent we wait fate
Afraid it's too late
Desperate to love
Anyone who sees us
Desperate that love
Will leave us
Unless we grasp
That love given
Can’t leave
Far better to give
Than to receive
Who then?
Who sees us, of course
And a child sees a child
Within love
We find what we seek
Waiting’s irrelevant
We’re already there
Suspending physical matter
Love is the only matter
You can take with you
This I’ve learned
And I see you
E1019-2014