Born 2CU
I was born to see you
And you desire to be seen
I always look at you
And it’s always been
Your beauty’s unmatched
By glitter and dare
In all time and Heaven
As none can compare
You’ll always be perfect
You may disagree
Still know that to me
It will always be
You’re my miracle
My blessing and breath
Nothing can change this
Not even death
No rhyme nor reason
There’s no ultimate why
For you giving your heart
On the Fourth of July
But you gave it to me
And I gave mine to you
It will always be we
Unaltered by time
Or sorely forced rhyme
Come whatever may be
And whatever we do
Five years baby
Thank you
Shall - 2023
Don’t let go
All my life it’s been
I lift something heavy
And a day or two later
I lift something light
The wrong way
And there it goes again
I tweak out my back
Careful movements
For a day or so and slowly
Everything finds its place
When I carry you
Across the threshold
Of our house of stone
In locked embrace
We’ll find our home
My back will be fine
And I think
I’ll never put you down
Tight in my arms
For the rest of time
I’ll carry you
Don’t let go
Shall - 2023
Together as one
My cough
May be something more
I don’t know
What I know is when I go
There’ll be things undone
I’ll go suddenly
Like you did
You went to take a bath
And that was it
You didn’t deserve it
And if I could
I’d give it back to you
But I can’t
What I can do
Is give you all I have
For the rest of my life
And when I go
I’ll come home to you
And we’ll be together
Shall - 2023
Heartbeat
I think about you
All the time
Sometimes I think
About a million things
And you before them
And during them
And after them
Like the tick tock
Of a clock
Like a heartbeat
You’re always present
And if you weren’t
Time would stop
Shall - 2023
Core of love
I will defend you
Even in a lie
And I would lie
To defend you
I’d also kill
Should the choice
Come to contrast
Protecting you
It’s sort of the definition
Of forsaking all others
For you
While there is honor
In preserving truth
I didn’t vow a vow
Of commitment to truth
I committed to you
And my honor is one
With that commitment
I’ll never side against you
And there’ll never be a time
When I’m not at your side
When we married
I chose you
Over this world
I chose you
Even before me
Because
That’s the core of love
Shall - 2023
Just to begin
I’ll keep my soul pristine
And in a good way
So you’ll have a clean place
To call home
My heart
I’ll fashion after you
It’s no good to anyone else
Stains of love for you
Won’t wash out
And my pillow will become
Just a favored treasure
When I first hold you
For real
My tears will fill
A river of happiness
Unquenchable desire
My selfish dream
Of we
Beyond anything
This world could offer
Will define a destiny
Only you can fill
To say you’re my queen
Is just to begin
Shall - 2023
When I cry
Because a silly film
Spins comic drama
Of unlikely love
And in the end a kiss
I need you and I get it
You are my music
And the lyric I’ve waited
All my life to find
And I know we have
Almost fourteen years
Between us
But we only have
About forty-five days
From the day you died
Until the day I found you
And on that day
My heart screamed
As collapse of a building
Condemned to demolition
I felt each floor fall
And in that moment
I couldn’t breathe
Or stop the screaming
So I said to God
Give her half my Heaven
She can’t be forsaken
She won’t be alone
I’ll stay with her
And belong to her
I won’t let go
It’s now been years
And just a moment ago
Shall - 2023
Fifty-two
Today’s your birthday
And you’re fifty-two
We’ll go out
Everything to do with you
Is a big deal to me
Because you’re beautiful
Because you’re perfect
Because I’m smitten
Because I adore you
For me
The best place to be
Is with you
You’re everything I want
Shall - 2023
Consumed
I think I gave you
Half my Heaven
So I’d know
Where to find you
Like the story shared
Destiny’s the bridge
I built to get to you
You like my bridge?
There’s none other
Like it
At first I didn’t know
That I was desperate
To be with you
But desperate for you
I’ve been ever since
Some say it’s a risk
That I might become
Consumed by want
I’m consumed now
Want’s all that remains
Want devoid
Of any other desire
Shall – 2023
Like we do
I can’t think of me
Without you
It wouldn’t be us
And that
Wouldn’t be me
I like you next to me
Close where I can see
I depend on you
On your being here
On your being we
Some say
How do I know
You’ll be waiting
Wanting for me
When I die?
They should worry
About who will be
Waiting for
Wanting for them
When they do
They should talk
To each other now
While it’s easier
Share their wants
And what’s to come
Will they make
Each other everything
Like we do?
Will they let go
And move on?
Will they prefer
To be alone?
I’d rather not be
Than not be with you
Shall - 2023
Superhero
My superpower
Is loving you
Shall - 2023
Home
Once I decided
I could be pure for you
That was it
And I’d not let anything
Stand between us
Since then
I’ve not considered
Anyone else
With you
My soul is content
My spirit’s at rest
You’re my home
And only desire
Shall - 2023
You’ll also have me
What am I doing?
I’m being happy
And this soul
Filled with happiness
Belongs to you
I gave it to you
I want to give you
This same happiness
From now on
Still at times
You had your doubts
And your concerns
That’s behind us
And sometimes
You’ll have your clouds
But you’ll also have me
Shall - 2023
Soul proprietor
There will always be
Butterflies that flutter by
But you needn’t worry
Or ever feel threatened
Nothing can threaten you
I won’t allow it
You are my only
You are my queen
You are my home
And I love my home
I’ll never leave you
I’ll never want to
So you can ask
A hundred times
Then you will know
It’s always so
I gave you my heart
My desire and my life
And yours is a home
Forever in my soul
I prepared it for you
So in a sense
You’re the soul proprietor
Of me
Shall - 2023
Instantly happy
As tomorrow arrives I’ll be
Fourteen years older
It’s been nice to be
Chronologically closer
For a brief while
So now I’ll look on
To September 6th, 2024
Your birthday and
Thirteen years again
I measure my life
In moments with you
You’re my Camas Winds
It means I live to be yours
Some will graciously say
You’re my sentiment
They don’t get it
And that’s ok
They don’t have to
To some
Your death is absence
To me you are presence
They visit time to time
But they don’t live here
I do
I live here with you
You’re not my sentiment
But instead my blessing
You’re the best of my life
And you’re my miracle
Not at all my loss
You’re my gain
And when I see you
I’m instantly happy
Shall - 2023
Thanksgiving
I’d like to have a fire
But will probably work
On the furnace install
So we can have heat
I’m thankful for you
And that I belong to you
You are my life
I say that a lot
Because it’s true
I thank every day
Because of you
Shall - 2023
Dolores heart
I gave her some help
Because she needed it
She didn’t ask
She didn’t notice me
I have a Dolores heart
Since you arrived
She might die
But not tonight
Maybe our words
Can save a life
Maybe not
But
If we didn’t write them
They wouldn’t
And
If we didn’t share them
They couldn’t
Shall - 2023
Beginning with you
You must understand
You’re my Camas Winds
It’s not just a concept
Or a song I wrote
It’s not some dream
Of star-crossed love
Or an endless irony
Absent of hope
At a time when time
Seems to have become
Of dismissed importance
When tomorrow’s destiny
Suggests the end
Of whatever this is
That we cling to
I found my life
I found you
You are where
My tomorrows began
And there’s no returning
To yesterday
Shall - 2023
The sun comes up
A storm builds inside me
I didn’t expect it
In truth at the start
I felt unworthy of you
Or your love
You wouldn’t see me
So rules of the universe
Would be preserved
And sensibility reserved
Along with them
But when you died
The universe failed
Its rules were exposed
Inside each of us
Live truths
Things we can’t accept
Things that must be so
And for me
Truth be told
You being alone
Couldn’t be true
Half my Heaven
The only thing worthy
That I could give you
Unaware my storm
Would begin
I always loved a storm
But this one scares me
I’ve never felt this way
Each time I see you
Or think of you
I want you more
Every step a blessing
Compelling desire
A risk beyond any path
I’ve ever taken before
Time says it’s not safe
To trust such happiness
Consuming conviction
Love mustn’t die for doubt
I swore on my soul
To be yours
For a day beyond time
I’ll never let you go
And I don’t want out
So as more becomes more
Passion grows brighter
Can it reach the intensity
Of the sun?
Time will tell
Shall - 2023
To my Camas Winds
You’re my reason
And why I’m so strong
I have my home
I have my love
I have you
I’ve no wants or desires
This world can provide
You’re all of them
And you’re in Heaven
This season of Christ
We reflect on our blessings
We weren’t filtered
Through turmoil of this world
Never burdened together
One might say it’s not fair
Our boundary was life
Our crossing is spiritual
And I don’t care about fair
I just live to be yours
So Merry Christmas my love
On our sixth one together
Shall - 2023